Monday, September 10, 2007
Blood, sweat & pee
Fresh off my lunchbreak, I must express my continued disappointment w/ the state of diagnostic testing today. At least as it's done at Qwest. If only this were about the cranky receptionist; but no, it's more, much more.
All things considered, and I will get to these things shortly, I don't consider the changes I observed today to be changes for the better. Certainly it was nice not to have to run around, tearfully lost w/ a sloshing cup of pee, but the alternative wasn't exactly delightful.
(What should never qualify as a) long story short(ish), this time around I was handed not one but two instruments: the standard cup, plus a small plastic vial marked at the top w/ something like 'max fill line.' Credit to my phlebotomist, I was given a thorough explanation of how to go about using cup and vial, including helpful hand gestures. Fast forward a few minutes to a disturbing scene: me standing over the toilet, sweating over the formidable task of transferring the contents of my now-filled cup to a vial that appeared to be shrinking by the second. Seriously, that top of that thing must have had a diameter of 0". What the hell was going on here? Where was my funnel? Trust me, I don't care how acute a pourer you are, w/o a middleman, you are not topping off that vial w/o wasting a good ounce to the floor/toilet/your hands. Next time I'm bringing my own.
Upon exiting the bathroom, I still had to carry my pee along w/ me, but it was at least small and contained, so that I was able to conceal it well enough behind my back (then at my right side as I passed folks on my left) as I made my way to the bloodletting room. Speaking of, that phlebotomist was tops, encouraging me to distract myself by "focusing on my dreams" as she took care of business. I think this actually worked.
Such a Monday.
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